How to Get What Most Professionals Want
How to Get What Most Professionals Want
Most professionals want a fulfilling career. The truth is: few will actually find one. It’s no big secret about what most professionals want but there are massive misunderstandings in how to achieve a fulfilling career. The reason most professionals will not ‘find’ a fulfilling career is because these jobs aren’t out there to be ‘found’. Fulfilling careers are MADE.
Revealing the Roadblocks
The roadblocks to a fulfilling career are amazingly simple but rooted in some of the hardest decisions you may ever make as a professional. You notice that I haven’t yet used the word ‘successful’ in lieu of ‘fulfilling’? There’s a reason for this! Not only has our society linked success to the ability to acquire material symbols of wealth: success in entirely in the eye of the beholder.
You can be materially successful as a professional and still be abjectly miserable. On the other hand, you can also be paid modestly and love what you do. The roadblock between success and fulfillment is your definition of success! It is absolutely possible to be well-paid as well as fulfilled. It’s also OK to have a modest income and look forward to each workday. Either path is successful! Both paths, however, require you to make smart decisions, be dedicated and establish discipline.
Success as the Slave-Driver
Welcome to America! The home of the Free, Land of the Brave and Over-Worked. You must admit that our work-hard, play-hard cultural ethic is a bit skewed. Most weeks it feels like working hard is all you ever do! We are a nation of perpetual workaholics that have merged the idea of success with significant physical manifestations:
- Obtaining an education at a good college
- Participating in the right sports, social society or academic organization
- Acquiring an appropriately expensive car to match your professional ‘status’
- Wearing brand-name clothing and electronics to impress others
- Socializing and eating out at all the right places
- Owning a nice house in the ‘right’ neighborhood
- Furnishing the same nice house in an expected level of style
- Spending your vacation at the expected locations
- Belonging to the appropriate social network, church or community organization
- Sending your children to the best schools
All this means that you are probably over-worked and need a fat paycheck to support it all!
Brainwashed?
The average American watches almost 5 hours of visual media per day. Shows, movies, videos, and skits are all available to us on any number of electronic devices. When TV first made its way into American homes in the 1950’s it created feelings of inadequacy in some, who felt their real lives should compare with the insipidly happy characters they saw on shows like Leave It to Beaver.
Today we are bombarded with visual images of what we ‘should’ be. We are heavily influenced by what we see advertised. The problem is, we don’t stop to consider if these social expectations are necessary for our happiness. Thanks to social media, TV and cultural brainwashing: most individuals have no idea that there’s even a choice! It starts as early as age 6 with the expectations around the best venue for a play-date, what smartphone your child receives and which tablet or Gamestation is under the tree at Christmas.
What’s worse? The same parents that moan about the cost are the ones allowing this pattern to be imprinted on their children. Some of the first conditioning we receive is to do well in school in order to go to a nice college so you can get a good paying job. No one ever mentioned a fulfilling job! Young children see their parents chronically over-worked and stressed out so often that it’s become the norm. Most of the pressure is put on performance, not life balance. We link the idea of performance to a paycheck before we graduate high school.
Frantic and Un-Fulfilled
I was extremely fortunate as a child. I was never expected to grow up and become a doctor, a lawyer, or even be a corporate big shot. It was my choice to pursue college and get a degree. I decided when I was a very young person that I was going to college so I could be a big fancy corporate architect. I had watched my mother work incredibly hard as a self-employed artist for years and decided that I wanted to make ‘big bucks’. Even though I wasn’t pressured by my family, I still succumbed to society’s ideal of success.
Many years later, I was desperate to get out of corporate and be self-employed! What I didn’t see when I was younger is that my mother’s work is a labor of love. No, she doesn’t make a big fat paycheck. However, she put me through college. She didn’t have all the corporate benefits, but she was able to call her own shots. My mother put good food on the table and made ends meet. My mother still works to this day and she’s arguably one of the best ceramic artists in the country. Most importantly, she has a fulfilling career.
The Path to Fulfillment
You can make your own fulfilling career! You don’t have to necessarily be self-employed to love what you do. You can work for a large corporation and create a compelling future. No matter what your focus, you are the one in charge of your professional destiny and you can make it happen. Remember that one of the beautiful things about living in America is that you have freedom of choice. You can CHOOSE to put your feet on the path towards fulfillment!
First, you need to have some honest self-talk. Decide whether you can find fulfillment in your current career or not. Are you unhappy with your career because you don’t like what you do or is it because of an external influence? If you need to change companies, locations or departments to get your mojo back: do it. However, if you are miserable about what you do for a living, it may be time for a career change.
Your Pivot Point
You will probably have tons of questions when you take your very first step towards a fulfilling career. Planning, determination, and discipline will transform your journey of achievement. Be candid with yourself but also remember to believe in you and your ability to make a smart change.
- Discover Your Strengths. Everyone is great at something! What are you passionate about? What made your heart lift as a young person? If you loved Legos, perhaps you missed your calling in construction, architecture or city planning. If your heart and soul is with animals – what about a pet-focused career? If you are a salesperson but really get excited about the numbers and data – consider an analyst position or even accounting. What do you dream about? Write these passions down.
- Realize Your Skills and Expertise. Next, discover your professional impact and understand your value. What are you excellent at? What are you the ‘go to’ person for? What skills have you gained and what expertise can you potentially leverage in a career transition? Write them all down. List your impact stories and uncover all of your accomplishments. You have tremendous value as a professional and as a person! If you do volunteer work that has an impact and must also be on your list.
- Understand Your Needs. This is where things get real. Remember the list of standard cultural expectations? It’s now time for you to decide what you genuinely need in life and what you can let go of. Do you need the large house or that third car? Do you have to take a vacation in Hawaii or would a camping trip to a National Park be fun too? There’s a difference between a need and a want. Make wise decisions about what your genuine needs are and list them. Cross out all the items on your list that you may ‘want’ but don’t ‘need’ to be fulfilled in life.
Bring it All Together
You WILL make your fulfilling career happen! Understand if you need to gain any certifications or take a class to get you closer to your goal. If you are able, establish these foundations while you are still under the umbrella of your current career. This will make the transition less financially stressful if you are looking at starting fresh with a new career focus.
If you are providing domestic support, have open discussions about your new focus and career aspirations with your family. Seek advice from a financial planner, mentor or someone you respect in the career area you are focused on. Be informed, do research, get the facts and make a plan before you dedicate your time and energy in a new direction.
Work the Plan
Firstly: having a plan is the key towards career success – whether you are sticking with your career or transitioning. No development happens in absence of a goal and no goal is achieved in absence of a plan. Understand your steps to get you where you need to go. Sometimes the next opportunity is just a step in the right direction.
No success is made overnight. The Williams twins didn’t learn to play tennis in a week. John Maxwell wasn’t an overnight leadership success. Simon Sinek didn’t obtain a million followers as soon as he found his ‘why’. You will experience setbacks. You may have to check and adjust as you move forward. The only difference between achievers and average performers is determination. Perseverance is what sets apart those who obtain fulfillment and those that opt for status quo. There is no success without failure somewhere in the journey.
Give Up (and Get Real) to Go Up
If you work the plan, stick to your dreams, keep your eyes open and be ready for opportunities when they arrive, you will make your fulfilling career. Remember that success is in the eye of the beholder. All of those who gain fulfillment acknowledge that there are some things you must let go of.
John Maxwell hits the nail on the head when he says that we all must “give up to go up”. We have to shed unnecessary baggage to climb the mountain and reach our goals. Look at your life right now. Is this what you really want? What do you have that you don’t need but you thought you ‘should’ have? What are you holding onto that you need to let go of in order to move in the direction of your dreams?
Get What Most Professionals Want
When I woke up in my mid-thirties and looked around at my life, I realized that I wasn’t following what my heart wanted me to do. My focus had been: get educated, get experienced, get a good job and make the big bucks. By age 38 I was poised at the brink of unending misery. Looking from the outside: my career was ideal American example of professional advancement. At the end of the day, that didn’t bring me fulfillment.
In reality, I was being ripped apart between what I loved and what was expected of me. I got real, owned my impact, leveraged my strengths and transformed my life. It is still changing to this very minute in magnificent leaps and bounds! You will be there too – if you want it. If you believe in you and don’t give up, you will get what most professionals want!
Erin Urban LSSBB, CPDC – is a member of the Forbes Coaches Council, a certified professional development coach and culture change leader with over 8 years of mentoring and coaching successful professional transformations. With an extensive background in leading individual, cultural and organizational change initiatives: her mission is to lift others up to defy their limits and exceed their goals.
